> I set a new PR for the half marathon at the beginning of April (1:19:24).  I’m quite pleased by that time.  Now that I’ve finally broken 1:20, it really puts the relative difficulty of that into perspective and makes me realize how much I was talking out of my ass here and here as well as a host of other places in the past (I’m sure).  I’ve come to realize just how fast running a 1:14 is – it’s truly frightening.  Let’s not even talk about the fact that the world record is well under an hour.

Between the adoption, J-hawk and the half marathon PR, I’m very much looking forward to the next few months of training, racing, and parenthood.

As I mentioned last time, I’ve got a lot of topics on the burner: Specific Prep, some product reviews (SpeedConcept 9 series vs. Cervel Dual, Zipp 808 FC, Carbon Wheel Brake pad comparison, shoes and some other fun stuff).  So bear with me and stay tuned!

Thanks to the gang at Emery’s for putting up with my indecision on this purchase for the last year!  I ran 8 miles on it last night to see how it works, and I’m pretty darn happy!

A special thanks go out to Inside Out Sports and Ironman Wheel Rentals.

Further appreciation goes out to Emery’s for their support this year and going forward, along with Gear-Grinder!

Typically – the way this works is I make a bunch of pretty graphs comparing the volume, TSS, IF, kJ, etc for this year against previous years, both on a month by month basis and a year as a whole basis.  Than I spend a bunch of time talking about things I did good and things I did bad – and what I need to do to continue to improve.

This years format will be a little different.  Why?  In the end, the details of the training are meaningless.  I believe there are three  reasons for this:

First, a season/year is simply an artificial construct we as humans pin ourselves into.  Success in triathlon (or life), contrary to what the corporate world tells us, is not defined by years, quarters, months or weeks.  Yes, milestone dates are critical for us to determine if we are moving in the right direction along the path of success, but we must be careful to remember that improving ourselves is a constant process and allowing ourselves to slip into predefined time constraints can limit our progress (more on that in a future post).

Second, how much or how little I (you) trained, or what I (you) did means nothing.  You don’t get an award for having the most TSS, or running the most miles.  Results is what matters – did you achieve what you wanted to achieve, when you wanted to achieve it?

Finally, what did you learn along the way – and how will you leverage that to achieve more?

With this new approach to the review, the part about results is going to be pretty boring.  While I had some up and down race performances this year, I delivered at my two key races.  In both races, I had life best performances.  One of them was nothing short of a breakthrough performance – one of those experiences where down the road you ask yourself “Did I really just do that?”  That breakthrough performance at Ironman Arizona – also checked off my longest standing triathlon goal – finishing as the first amateur at an Ironman race.

Results – talked about, so now lets talk about some insightful stuff that I learned this year, and how I intend to use it in the future to continue improving.

Last year – one of the things that I really tried to figure out was, what did I do differently between 2009 and 2010 – that was the difference between a horrid 2009 and a successful 2010.  Logically one could ask – what did I do differently between 2010 and 2011 – that yielded a breakthrough.  Last year I examined a lot of different things that I thought it might be: taper, rest, fitness, execution – in the end I settled that execution was the *best* difference, but I still wasn’t sure.

After Ironman Hawaii and Ironman Arizona – I think it is really two things.  Commitment and belief.  In late August I sketched out what I believed was a training block that would deposit me in both Kona and Tempe with the right level of fitness.  I committed to executing that block 100% – I never once doubted what I was doing.  This left me with a dozen or so workouts that boosted my confidence like never before, each workout reinforcing the commitment and belief in this path… In the end the result was me believing with all of my being that I could put together the pieces to execute a breakthrough performance.

Kona was not the breakthrough performance I had hoped for, but it built my confidence even more – knowing that I could ride an Ironman bike leg @ ~230 watts in hot conditions, get off the bike, blow up on the run, but still run a sub 3:30….it started the wheels turning….

While commitment and belief were two big things that helped enable the breakthrough this season, the hands down biggest item that contributed to the breakthrough this year was nutrition and I don’t mean race nutrition.  Nutrition is a bit vague of a term, on the surface you might take it to mean I wasn’t eating a healthy diet or was short on a critical vitamin or mineral – perhaps resulting in anemia.  If you read the word nutrition and thought that – you’d be wrong.  I mean nutrition in a simpler sense – purely from an intake perspective.  In an attempt to get back down to what I raced Ironman Wisconsin at last year (173 pounds) – I ended up eating too little, forcing my body into a type of starvation mode – killing my workout quality, and resulting in no weight loss.  So I’d eat less – and the situation would get worse.  On and on for several months – roughly January to August.  In late August for a two week period I obsessively counted my calories and estimated my calorie burn.  What I found was that I was significantly under-eating 4 or 5 days a week and over-eating 2 or 3 days a week.  After that period of observation, I focused on continuing to count intake and burn – shooting for a slight deficit.  The result – my workout quality and consistency went WAY up, and from September 1st to Kona I lost 5 pounds, and between Kona and IMAZ I lost an additional 4 pounds!  All the result of eating more most days (on average 700 to 800 calories more), and less on a couple days (700 to 1000 less).  I arrived at Ironman Arizona the leanest I’ve been in my adult life.

Nutrition, commitment, and belief – how can I use the identification of these factors to continue to improve my performance?  Nutrition is definitely the most simple – count calories, estimate burn – make sure they match, so that I’m fueled properly for workouts and racing.

Commitment and belief are very intertwined.  I simple need to commit to the process of executing my training and believing that I am capable of great things.  As I am a self-coached athlete, I need to make the further step of believing that I know what I need to, to successfully guide myself to success.

In the end 2011, was the most successful season of triathlon yet, and not just because of some great performances, but because of the important lessons I learned about training, racing, and myself.

Where to from here?  In a change of heart for me, my goals are staying between myself and a selected few.  You’ll just have to wait and see…

Oh, and because I am such a numbers orientated guy – I will be posting a breakdown of 2011′s training in the next few weeks, but it’s simply a curiosity - almost entirely the same as it has been before!  Crazy like a fox.

Excellence should be demanded by our peers.  Labeling those that demand excellence as haters, bashers, etc only promotes mediocrity.  -Paulo Sousa

Paulo laid this gem on twitter a few days ago, interestingly enough mediocrity was referenced again when I checked google reader this morning by Coach Troy - “…Someone, somewhere, is training more and harder than you are… in the sunshine, and you know it.  Actually, the naysayers are nuts for living a life of mediocrity and without any physical suffering…”

In fact google reader has been full of posts about goals, targets, plans and missions that last few days.  It always seems to me that the things I need to hear in life always seem to show up in the blogs I follow – just when I need to hear them most.  Perhaps it’s some coincidental twist of fate, that those I find worth reading know what I need to hear, or perhaps it’s just me assigning value to random words, by random people.  Regardless – the topic of Excellence has been looming large in my mind these last few weeks since Kona.

Many years ago as an age-group swimmer, I had a goal of qualifying to swim in the Olympics – I went so far as to tape a sheet of paper to my bathroom mirror with goal times.  My goal time for the 200 meter freestyle (LCM) was something ridiculous like 1:50 - mind you this was in 1994 and I wanted to go in 1996.  For some reason my young brain was convinced that if I set a goal and wanted it badly enough it would just happen.  I could go on and provide many examples of this over my life, but that example is pretty poignant – a goal does not happen, you simple do not get from point A to point B, beat the local fast guy, qualify for Kona, or podium at Kona – simple because you set a goal and want it to happen, or because time will magically make it happen next year (or at some other far off point).

The unfortunate reality is – we often set a goal, and fail to reach that goal.  When I was a swimmer in college one of my goals was to best the school records for my high school in my three events.  Besides the fact that I was 4 years late and many dollars short – I went into my last individual college swim race having done just that in the 50 free and 100 butterfly – however my 48.12 100 free (SCY) in said final race, fell just short of the 47.99 mark I needed.  Despite having bettered the PR I had set just a few hours early in prelims by 2/10ths – I was very disappointed.  The point is – failing to reach a clearly defined goal is hard to handle, should that goal be public declared – it can be even more difficult.  This can lead to embarrassment, frustration, low motivation – basically all sorts of bad things.

At this point, I’m not surprised if your asking yourself – but goals are important, they provide us motivation to get out the door for a workout (or in the basement as the case may be!) – how can you improve if you don’t set a goal?  Goals are important, but it’s important to make a distinction between a goal (mission) and a desired outcome (target).  The goal or the mission is *how* you achieve the desired outcome – the goal is *not* the outcome.

For example – if you want to qualify for Vegas or Kona – that (the act of qualifying) is the outcome you want.  To reach that outcome you must have a goal to become a better (the best) triathlete you can be.  This is the crucial step I was missing as a youngster; I would define a desired outcome, but I wouldn’t pursue the path of being the best swimmer I could be – so that I would move towards that outcome.  Instead – I just kept doing what I had been doing – which *was* moving me closer, but was also holding me back.

So back to the title of this post…  Don’t pursue an outcome – pursue excellence.  Wake up each morning and do the best job you can of being an employee, a triathlete, a father, a mother, whatever.  The path of excellence will only move you closer to where you want to be, never holding you back.  Best of all you can evaluate yourself daily on if you are living up to your goal, and if you fall a bit short of your outcome – you can take pride in knowing that you accomplished your goal of being your best.

Be excellent.

The work done starting now and over the next few months is crucial to how you will be able to prepare for your A race next summer, and ultimately how you will be able to perform at that race (and beyond).  Check out my page on training thoughts to help guide you through the process of planning out your next season and a “guide” to help you with the training.  Is my approach the best way?  No, I’m sure folks out there like Joel Filliol or Paulo Sousa have a better system of planning and methodology to training (not to mention more experience) – but the fact is unless you sit down and make a plan – you will not reach your goals.  The act of planning (and sticking to that plan) in and of itself will greatly increase the likelihood of you achieving your goals.

If you want to improve your game, but don’t have the time (or don’t want to spend the time) to do the proper planning,  if you find yourself stuck banging your head against a wall, or you aren’t sure which way the road should lead you – you should think about hiring a coach.   Some members of my short-list at listed to the left of this page – I would encourage you to contact them.  You may be surprised to find that some of them have full rosters for 2012 already.  You also have the option of heading over to the contact page and inquiring about what I can do for you.

Whatever you decide – I urge you to do it now – time lost is time you will never get back.

It is not me against them.  It is not me against you.  It is me against me.

There will be moments of glory, moments of pain.

There will be moments where I will feel invincible, moments where I want to quit.

This is normal, for what I will be doing is not normal.

I will remember the work that I have done, the frustrations I have conquered – all to get to this day.

No quarter will be asked, none will be given.

I will drive forward remembering the high points and the low points of this journey – both will fuel my passion and desire.

I will cross the finish line – victorious, but remember that it was not easy, and not without sacrifice.

War never is.

Anyways – it’s been a long and tough summer.  I’ve had a number of sub-par performances, and a lot of frustrations, but the last few weeks it’s turned around.  I accepted the fact that Kona will be what Kona will be – and I simply needed to put in the best work I can the last few weeks – and then execute my race.

That mental shift did something, my training has been going great, and I am stoked for the race.  I cannot wait until 7am on October 8th – I’m going to crush it.

At this point before IMWI last year – I was not feeling good in workouts, scared, and freaking out – right now I’m ready to race – NOW – at least mentally.

Physically, I have a few key workouts to go through to fine tune everything – than I will crush it!

New Balance 904 – I’ve run in every NB 900 shoe since the 900.  The 904 was definitely my favorite: firm, responsive, easy to get on, durable.  I really enjoyed the blend of firm cushioning the shoes provided, but the forefoot was thin enough that I still had a nice feel for the ground.  My favorite shoe of the NB 90X series.  Rating: A

New Balance 905 – Same as the NB 904, but with a slightly different tongue that made the shoe difficult to get on in transition.  New balance also made a slight change to the placement of the laces holes that made it difficult for me to dial in my lace tightness.  Rating: A-

Zoot Ultra Tempo 3.0 – On a whim I decided to get a pair of Zoot shoes a try.  Since I prefer to run sock-less, and have always had issues with moisture build up on long runs – I figured these were worth a try.  Compared to the NB 90Xs – these felt a little like boats, but overall very similar feel of the shoe.  My biggest complaint was the availability (or lack there off) and the lacing system.  I really had a tough time getting them cinched tight enough. Rating: B

Saucony Kinvara – A friend (who works for Newton) – convinced me I should come to the running store he works at to give a pair of newtons a try.  I ended up walking out with a pair of Kinvaras.  Initially, I was a big fan – so much so that I immediately bought two more pairs to have a 3 pair rotation.  After a few weeks though I began to get really annoyed with the squishiness of the shoe.  They didn’t have nearly the responsiveness that the NB 904/905 of the Zoot had.  I had major problems getting the lacing right - too loose or too tight – I just couldn’t find the right “setting”.  Rating: B

Saucony A4 – Despite the things I didn’t like about the kinvara – I was really drawn to their weight, and the flat insole (4mm drop).  I decided to give the A4s a try.  Everything I read seemed to indicate that they were much more responsive then the A4s, light, and had a flat insole.  I’ve only done a handful of runs in them, but I really enjoy them so far.  I have yet to run longer then an hour in them, but I will shortly. On the plus side – it was very very simple to get the lacing dialed in.  Rating: A

New Balance 1190 – I was disappointed that New Balance dumped the 900 series – which really lead me on this journey of new shoe testing.  After growing annoyed with the Kinvara – I decided I’d pick up a pair of 1190s and give them a shot.  Like the A4s, I only have a handful of runs in them (mostly long runs) – and to this point I have to say I’m pretty disappointed with the changes.  New Balance lowered the insole a few mm’s, ,but kept the drop consistent with it’s predecessor.  Compared to the A4, the 1190 is much softer to run in, and the heel is HUGE (compared to the Kinvara/A4).  My biggest complaint is the lacing (are you noticing a theme).  I’ve had a really difficult time getting the lacing right so the shoe feels like it fits.  I also don’t like th heel cup of the shoe.  Despite a summer of barefoot running and reinforcing my callouses, my first barefoot run in this shoe results in a huge blister on my heel.  Yuck.  Moisture is a big problem as well – this shoe is like a sponge.  A definite step backwards from the 905, and a huge step backwards from the 904.  Rating: C

I’m going to run the A4s out and probably pick up another pair.  I may also give something ike the Asics Piranha or Addias Rocket a try - we’ll see.  I’m definitely digging the low heel drop, but I continue to be plagued by the lacing and moisture problems.  We shall see.

This season has been filled with a multitude of starts, false starts and changes of direction for me – me searching for a secret that I thought I was missing (but in truth I had).  If you’ve read my blog with any regularity over the years or months – you’ll have seen the last few months contain a few themes: a lack of posting and confusion.  That same period of time has seen me race with mixed results, train with a variety of different approaches, with building level of frustration and mixed acceptance of the situation.

However while my mind was busy over analyzing the situation, questioning myself, and trying to determine the proper path – my body was busy doing what was asked of it, even when too much was asked – it stepped up and offered all that it could – waiting.

Waiting for me to mentally come full circle, process the lessons of the last 6 months and realize this isn’t complicated.  Work is required.  Rest is required.  How much, when you do it, and how you do it are unimportant.

A few weeks ago I watched Mark Allen speak, I was struck by a comment of his (paraphrasing) – “Hellriegal was 4 mintues in front of me with 8 miles to go, I had made up 30 seconds per mile until this point.  I knew I couldn’t outsprint him, so I was ready to quit.  Than I realized that I was waiting for a billboard on the Queen K to say “Mark, if you give 100% right now – you will win.”"  Life doesn’t have those sorts of guarantees, let alone personalized billboards with the message you need – when you need it…

Once I was ready to turn my mind off and committed to the work and the process, my body was ready.  Yesterday it told me it was.  It kept the faith.

Why did it all turn out like this for me? I had so much promise. I was personable. I was bright. Oh, maybe not academically speaking, but I was perceptive. I always know when someone’s uncomfortable at a party. It all became very clear to me sitting out there today, that every decision I’ve ever made in my entire life has been wrong. My life is the complete opposite of everything I want it to be. Every instinct I have in every aspect of life, be it something to wear, something to eat… It’s often wrong.

In the time since my last post I’ve come to believe that I’ve been approaching this all wrong.   After the Triple T, and Lake Mills, I had high hopes for the Rochesterfest Triathlon a few weeks ago. I felt that as long as some fast Minnesotan – David Thompson – didn’t show up, I would be able to easily be in the running for the win – and as long as I wasn’t dumb should be able to walk home with a fairly major race win.  Despite never racing in Minnesota before, this is what my athlinks/google stalking of what I was able to deduce the usual suspects of SE MN tri scene to be – and their past results at this race and other races this year.  The glimpses I had seen from racing and training, combined with physics told me that I should dominate the dojo.

Confident? Cocky? Aggressive?  Absolutely. Realistic?  After my season thus far, I felt so.

Not being able to put faces to my internet research I intended to start the swim conservatively and locate the swimmers as things unfolded.  A couple hundred meters into the swim, I located the fast guys 10 to 20 meters in front of me.  Not wanting to swim by myself, I decided to put in a strong effort to either close the gap, or make it such that a good run on the beach between loops would put me on their feet.  I was able to pull that off flawlessly, I spent the second 750 meters of the swim drafting like a champ. I came out of the water 4th, and was out onto the bike second.

I spent the first few minutes getting situated, settling my head, and assessing the situation.  There was one guy in front of me, and another shortly behind gaining quickly.  “Fine, I’m going to let him come around and then let him set the pace for a bit, and I will make a move once I see how I feel.”

As he pulled around, I let him open up the 10 meters, then I went to punch the gas to stay there.  265 watts.  I took my foot off the gas for a second, and put the pedal through the floor – 280 watts. “WTF.” is all I could come up with.  I had swam perfectly, no signs of over-swimming as I moved through T1 – I was with it, not dazed, not breathing hard, but here I was and my red-line was only 280 watts?

The run?  More of the same.  Based on the context of my season up to that point,  I would have considered the pace I mustered the bottom end of an acceptable half-iron.

I’ll spare you the blow by blow details of the race.  I managed to win the hard fight for 4th place (by mere seconds).  However, much of the time of the race (and drive home) was spent in thought and then in conversation with Mary – about what happened, what went wrong, if this was the start of a repeat of 2009.

I was really, really perplexed.  Training under Mike had gone well, training after mike had gone well – but *hard*.  I had been gradually that hitting my run intervals was getting tougher.  I was managing on the bike, but those workouts were no cake walk either.

I also looked at a bit more historic basis and noticed trends of being able to really nail threshold intervals – crushing them at times, and at other times failing my threshold intervals or finding them horrible rather than merely uncomfortable.

Datapoints such as my highest 60 minute power ever being in January and other tidbits like my entire 2009 season, pigman, and other fantastic flameouts in training or racing floated through my thoughts, Steve Johnson’s IMCDA race report - 4x runs a week and a 3:03 IM marathon!

Between my thoughts, feedback from Mary, some smart people I poked and prodded, friends – primarily Matt and Eric – I’ve come to the conclusion that I’ve pretty much spent a lot of my triathlon career under-recovered.  I won’t use the word overtrained – as that implies a pretty serious state – that requires focused, long term recovery.  I practiced the more is more approach, but failed to apply the full approach: More is more, unless it is to much.  Then, less is more.

Coming to that conclusion was exciting, terrifying, embarrassing, and rewarding all at once.

Exciting: This could be the “secret” training key that I have been searching for!

Terrifying: I have to train less/easier – OMG!!!

Embarrassing: My freak-out prior to the triple t was probably unwarranted – and Mike *was* most likely sending me on the right path, and introduced a lot of stress into my life and the lives of others – needlessly.

Rewarding: If this proves to be right, the act of finally figuring out the next piece in the puzzle is HUGE!

Time will tell if this line of thought is right, and if I have the discipline to see it through – it’s going to be scary – the instinct part of me is already screaming bloody murder.

Time to see if this rabbit hole leads anywhere.